Why Forgiveness Is the Foundation of Your Midlife Awakening

TrueSelf in Flip-Flops: One woman’s barefoot journey to self-love & salty freedom

In our 40s, life begins to whisper truths we can no longer ignore.

The career that no longer fulfills. The relationships that quietly drain. The voice inside that keeps asking, Is this all there is?

For many women, this decade becomes a turning point—a space between what was and what wants to be born. But to step into that next version of yourself, there's one essential key: forgiveness. Not just forgiving others. Not just forgiving the past. 

But forgiving yourself—completely.

The Midlife Shift: From Survival to Soul

Studies show that happiness dips in the late 40s, but then begins to rise again through the 50s and beyond. Why? Because we start shedding the masks. We stop living for approval and start craving truth.

And truth has a cost: it asks us to face what we’ve been avoiding.

• The mistakes we regret

• The people we resent

• The dreams we gave up on

• The parts of ourselves we’ve judged or neglected

This is where forgiveness becomes the spiritual gateway to freedom.

Forgiveness: Not an Act, But a Return

In my book, Love Yourself Through Forgiveness, I illustrate that forgiveness isn’t about condoning or forgetting. It’s about releasing the emotional hold the past has on us.

Forgiveness clears emotional clutter.

It’s like opening the windows in a stuffy room and letting light back in.

And the ancient Hawaiian practice of Ho’oponopono offers us one of the most profound and accessible ways to begin that clearing.

“I’m Sorry. Forgive Me. Thank You. I Love You.”

These four phrases—spoken inwardly with sincerity—are not magic words.

They’re keys.

Each phrase unlocks a different chamber of the heart:

• I’m sorry — acknowledges what’s been carried

• Forgive me — asks for release without self-punishment

• Thank you — opens to grace

• I love you — restores connection and wholeness

  
  

When practiced daily, this mantra becomes more than a ritual. It becomes a return to self.

Why Forgiveness Must Come First

Before you change careers, start a new relationship, launch a business, or rewrite your story—start here with forgiveness.

Because when the heart is heavy, we sabotage our joy. Because when we carry guilt, we question our worth. Because when we still hurt, we build lives based on protection, not purpose. Forgiveness clears the path so the real you can rise.

Your Next Step: A Gentle Practice

Start with 5 minutes a day. Close your eyes. Breathe deeply.

And repeat:

“I’m sorry. Forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”

Say it to your past. Say it to your younger self. Say it to the version of you who tried and fell and got back up again.

Say it—and watch the weight begin to lift.

💫 With love (and salty toes), 

Ada Adrianna